Bad Biology (Guest Post Movie Review)

Horror
Bad Biology Poster

It’s time for another guest review from Jason Wallach. This time it’s the Frank Henenlotter film Bad Biology, which… well, it’s weird sounding, but I’ll let the following review show you what it’s all about…

So I’m a little behind on getting to this film, I had read a little about it a few years back, say in 2008. The film was actually released in the US in 2010 so I take a small amount of comfort in that my seeing this film was only really almost five years overdue. And let’s just come right out and state the obvious here, it’s a Frank Henenlotter film let alone the first Frank Henenlotter film since Basket Case 3 in 1992. If you are a fan of Herschel Gordon Lewis or even John Waters, then I’ll make the assumption that you know who Frank Henelotter is. If you’ve even seen one of his films and liked it or maybe even have a self-esteem high enough to have modified your own genitalia … then you’re likely to really appreciate this film. So that’s my opener… let’s get down to brass tax!

This film is the most bizarre and unlikely love story… possibly ever! The film introduces us to two young, sexually insatiable individuals; Jennifer (Charlee Danielson) and Batz (Anthony Sneed) who are completely unaware of each other’s existence. Big deal, you say? Well the thing about Jennifer and Batz is that they both have mutant genitals. For instance, Jennifer has seven clitorises (that she knows of) and because of this her hormonal and reproductive capabilities are, shall we say, accelerated. She can have sex, conceive, run the gamut of emotions and culinary cravings and give birth to horribly deformed babies in about two hours. And for those of you who dislike the sounds of babies crying, RE-LAX, she discards them all shortly after expelling them from her body!

But wait, don’t leave yet… there’s more!

Bad Biology Lady

And Batz? Well, at birth the doctor accidentally cuts his penis off instead of cutting the umbilical cord! It was reattached, but didn’t function. So Batz began injecting it with steroids and hormones causing his schmeck to double in size and gain its own consciousness. Batz, of course, turns to heroin, tranquilizers… whatever will chill his oligarchical pudenda out. Oh, and of course I cannot leave out the thermos sized, slinky and dish soap filled mechanical wank machine Batz built to satiate the ever burgeoning demands of his tyrannical tallywhacker!

So now what? Well the two do eventually meet and are forever bonded by their mutations convinced they are the only two that can sexually satisfy one another. And the rest? I’m not going to spoil it for anyone, you really do simply just have to see this film!

As Henenlotter films go I have to say Frank has really outdone himself here – and that’s saying a lot after films like Basket Case, Brain Damage and Frankenhooker! It’s simply one of the most bizarre and sickly hysterical films I’ve seen. Replete with his signature sleaze, gore and lunacy, Bad Biology is an instant cult classic like anything Henenlotter does. It is undeniably certain to offend the sensibilities of just about everyone. I personally don’t see how you could take this film seriously, it’s too far gone and over the top for that. It’s a wondrous thing to behold and guaranteed to drop your jaw many times during its duration. The acting and FX is cheesy, strange and delightful! Highly entertaining, I think the film is a hoot! Beautifully shot on 35-millimeter film, Bad Biology is worth watching even if you don’t like it. You are a matter of rare quandary Frank Henenlotter… and God bless you!!

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