Black X-Mas Movie Review

Horror

I’m shocked, absolutely shocked. Here I was all these years thinking that the remake of Black Christmas was just some shoddy cash in that didn’t offer anything good. Instead, it’s actually a pretty sweet, gory film, that provides a quick, quirky story and does nothing to tarnish the original film. Plus, it’s filled to the brim with some sweet sexy ladies. Yep, I’m sold!

Release: Dec 25th, 2006

Rating: NR    
Run time: 84 min  
Starring: Katie Cassidy, Michelle Trachtenberg
Director: Glen Morgan
Official Trailer: Black X-Mas

Short nitty-gritty plot description from IMDb is as follows: An escaped maniac returns to his childhood home on Christmas Eve, which is now a sorority house, and begins to murder the sorority sisters one by one.

Tatlock’s Quick ‘n Dirty Recap: The girls of Delta Alpha Kappa are getting ready for Christmas like most other people do, by drinking and bitching at each other. In fact, they are so busy being mean to one another, they don’t notice that they are slowly being picked off one by one.

Could it be the psychotic legend himself, Billy, who grew up at the sorority house? He did just escape and is heading home, but with the killings having already started, things aren’t so cut and dry.

Speaking of cut and dry. Crystal Lowe looking way too skinny in a bikini.

Tatlock’s Opinion: I know the general consensus on this movie is that it’s shit, shouldn’t of been made and not worth your time. If you would’ve told me that before I saw the movie, I would’ve agreed with you no problem. However, now that I’ve seen it, there is no way I believe that. In fact, I think the movie is fun, gory, full of some groovy kills, morbid humour, a whole lot of gorgeous women and a tiny bit of nudity (actually that’s kind of a negative thing, as more nudity would’ve been so freaking awesome.)

Speaking of freaking awesome. Lacey Chabert in a black bikini.

Now mind you, I saw the unrated cut, so maybe the theatrical was much worse, but honestly I can’t see how it would’ve been. The movie doesn’t waste any time getting to the killing and the general mood of the film is to have fun and that’s it. It doesn’t try to be serious and it clearly knows that it ain’t going to win over the people who love the original, so it doesn’t try to mimic it much at all. It just throws in some gorgeous babes in the meat grinding and sets to purah. Plus, the ending was just hilarious, cheesy and awesome all wrapped up in one tight x-mas gift.

Speaking of tight. Mary Elizabeth Winstead in my ballroom with the rope

Anything I didn’t like you may be asking? Well, I mean, there is some cheese here and there with the acting and there were a few kills that could’ve been even more gory. Plus, the revelation of the killer isn’t something that’s going to shock you to the core, but you know what, who cares! This movie is fun and that’s all that matters.

Speaking of fun. Michelle Trachtenberg removing a bikini.

Verdict: I can’t recommend Black X-Mas enough. I’m sure a few people out there will think I’m crazy for loving this cheesefest, but trust me folks, for being a remake of a classic, this movie has enough of it’s own original holiday cheer for me to give this one a high recommend!

Speaking of highly recommended. Katie Cassidy enjoying a barely there bikini.

Rating: 

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