Machete Movie Review

Horror
Release: 2010, Rating: R, Runtime: 105 min.

Thanks to the big movie experience of Grindhouse, which consisted of Planet Terror and Death Proof, we were treated with some groovy faux trailers, one of which was a little one called Machete, starring Danny Trejo. Now, three years later, we got the full feature length movie adaptation, but does it live up to the greatness of the trailer, or fall face first into a pile of grindhouse crap? Read on to find out…

Short nitty-gritty plot description from IMDb is as follows: After being set-up and betrayed by the man who hired him to assassinate a
Texas Senator, an ex-Federale launches a brutal rampage of revenge
against his former boss. 

Machete is all about the trashy story, which is full of blood, guts and boobies. The acting is awful, which is intentional (well, I hope it is) and the story is completely over the top. It involves Danny Trejo as Machete, ex-Federale, who after getting left for dead, skips over the border into the USA and gets roped up in taking down a corrupt senator, played by Robert De Niro. Turns out however, that the person that hired him, Michael Booth (played by Jeff Fahey), was actually setting him up, which sets off a crazy as all hell story, involving a sexy Michelle Rodriguez and an even sexier Jessica Alba, all who fall madly in love with Machete. Clearly, this movie is far fetched, yet still lots of fun.

I do have to sadly say that the movie kinda falls apart after the first 10 kick ass minutes. In those 10 minutes, the movie is clearly channeling that grindhouse look and it’s awesome-balls. Sadly, they kinda forget about the look and feeling and turn into your standard, yet fun, crazy action movie. I mean, what’s not to love about a Mexican Steven Seagal.

The movie runs overly long and feels like it drags on and on, but when it’s good it’s good. It doesn’t take itself serious and it rightfully never should. There isn’t much more to say about this movie. I’ve listed what I felt was wrong with the movie, which honestly should never stop you from watching it. It took me a long time to get around to watching it, which was a sin on my part, but thankfully I can now say, I witnessed the craziness of Machete.

Rating:

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